Inventive Hospitality

Robert E. Hall
Tarrytown United Methodist Church

August 30, 2009

Text: Romans 12: 13; Hebrews 13:2; Matthew 25:35

One of the aspects of the New Testament that I love is its drive toward real life. Notice in the Letter to the Hebrews the author spends 12 chapters laying out a sustained, soaring Christology. Jesus Christ, we are told, is the first-born from the dead, the heir of all things, the great high priest, the perfect and lasting sacrifice, the one who now sits in majesty at the right hand of God.

Then at the beginning of the 13th chapter, he tells them, “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.” After this, he tells them they should visit those who are in prison, stay faithful to their marriage vows, keep their life free from the love of money. A high Christology coupled with practical advice about life. (See this point made more eloquently in Thomas Long’s commentary on the Letter to the Hebrews, page 142.)

When we come to know, to believe that God is love; when we have known and experienced the love of Jesus Christ in a Christian community; when this knowledge has penetrated our hearts, then our attitudes start changing. We are motivated to shape our lives in a way that is fitting, that reflects “the way God has dealt with his rebellious creation.” We want to reflect the loving grace of the God who has been hospitable to us. (Emil Brunner, The Epistle to the Romans)

Or, to put it more realistically, we begin the long journey toward maturity in showing hospitality. The circle of love that we know in the Christian community is a permeable circle of caring. Yes, we love sisters and brothers in the fellowship; but we are pushed and pulled by God not to be so in-grown that we have no room in our circles for strangers.I came across this third century advice given to bishops of the church: “If a destitute man or woman, either local or a traveler, arrives unexpectedly, especially one of older years, and there is no place [for them], you, the bishop, make such a place with all your heart, even if you yourself should sit on the ground, so that you may not show favoritism among human beings, but that your ministry may be pleasing toward God.” (Quoted in Long, page 142-3) From the “free love of your heart,” not for any gain or desire for recognition, Martin Luther wrote. (Commentary on Romans).

“I was a stranger and you welcomed me,” Jesus said. And if we take Jesus’ warning in Matthew 25 seriously, the whole attitude of the congregation must change. (Some of the following insights have been gleaned from Bishop Robert Schnase. See his helpful book, Five Practices of Fruitful Congregations.) Hospitality begins to shape our whole life as a church. Not just the ushers or the greeters or the pastors and other staff. We are always challenging ourselves to be creatively, inventively welcoming. This requires us to walk in the shoes of strangers.

Imagine a young single mother coming into church for the first time. She may not know which door to come in, where the nursery for her youngest is, where the restroom is. She may be nervous about whether she will know what to do in the service---when to stand or sit or join in. Which pew will she take? Are there some seats that are “reserved?” Will her children be too unruly for those sitting around them? She really wants a new church home; she has felt the stresses of a recent move, then the reduction in income that has come. Will there be a place for her in this church? For many people it takes courage to come upon the church grounds for the first time!  A church which takes Jesus’ words seriously would say to themselves, “This is a member of Jesus’ family, and Jesus wants us to treat her as we would treat Jesus if he were here.” (Page 13) Can you remember when you first came into a church? What did it feel like? Were you received and welcomed? Did anyone speak to you? Did anyone even look your way? Or were you ignored? In this world of alienation, hurriedness and brusqueness, people long to find a place where they can belong. As people of faith, we believe that there is no greater good news than the news that God loves them, that they are valued, and their life counts for something. And we are called to offer the love of Jesus incarnated in a flawed but hospitable community. Consider what it would mean for us to take Jesus’ seriously. All aspects of our church life would reflect generous hospitality: Sunday School Classes, Choirs, Mission trips and outreach projects, the Vacation Bible School, the youth group. The Building and Grounds and Trustees will want to be sure that this church home is “fresh, clean, appealing, easy to navigate, safe, attractive,” with signs that guide people to their destinations. They will want to do everything humanly possible so that people with disabilities can find their way to where they want to go, and get help if they need it. Leaders of worship will want to make the bulletin user friendly. Such a mindset on the part of a church issues in intentional, planned efforts, as well as spontaneous actions of neighborliness.

One day on vacation long ago, we got out of our car on the parking lot of a new church---one we had never attended before. We were greeted immediately by a volunteer who smiled, welcomed us, and pointed us in the right direction. Then we were greeted at the doorway to the narthex by another member. Then an usher handed us a bulletin and led us down the aisle to an open pew. Three people showed us hospitality----before the service even began! They didn’t just hand us a piece of paper, they made us feel at ease. They didn’t just point to a place to sit, they escorted us.  Obviously this was an organized effort: people had been recruited who had the gift of helpfulness, and they were assigned to their posts. But this is necessary because what is everybody’s business may end up being nobody’s business. We too often think that welcoming people is the pastors’ job, or someone else’s. Now I have never been in a church that did not think it was hospitable! But in some, its best trait----friendliness among the members----becomes its greatest downfall. We are so often so busy visiting with those we know strangers are invisible to us.

I remember vividly my first Annual Conference session in Ft Worth, at  First UMC. Conference is an annual gathering of pastors and lay delegates from all over the region. I was a college student, recently licensed to preach, the very lowest rung on the clergy ladder. I went alone. And for the first two days, I was truly invisible. No one spoke to me unless I spoke first. When breaks came and people scattered for local restaurants, no one invited me to join them. I went home early, feeling like I had mistakenly shown up at someone else’s family reunion! Now I am a relatively private person, and I do not like to be the center of attention (for very long!) So I can deal with solitude just fine. But even private people appreciate being welcomed. Think what it would have been like if just one person had said hello, asked me who I was, and invited me to sit with them. I never forgot that first conference session and I have been determined ever since that I would always keep an eye out for present-day strangers at events like these. Attentiveness is the key practice of hospitality. Some people come more naturally to this practice than others, but we can all learn new behaviors. Of course, we must respect peoples’ “space,” and their desire to remain anonymous if they want to. Hospitality is not invasion, not throwing ourselves on people.  Most people do not want to be pounced on when they arrive for the first time. (Lord deliver me from being asked to stand and introduce myself in a sanctuary full of strangers, as Carol and I were in a Methodist church two years ago. That was not hospitality. That was torture!) We can, however, make the first move to recognize that they are present, and that we care.

Hospitality reaches into weekdays, too! We can invite people to come to TUMC, and to our ministries and missions at this church. When inquirers asked about who Jesus was, the invitation of the disciples was simple: “Come and see.” (John 1:39)  We are never hesitant to tell people about our favorite restaurant, our treasured hiking trails or music venues. But we clam up when it comes to letting people in on the meaning of Christ and the church in our lives. We don’t want to sound fanatical. But we can at least be real!  When people ask what you did this summer, you can tell them, “I had the greatest time working with the children in the VBS; the love of God was almost tangible.”  If a friend is going through a hard time, you can let them know that you found real help visiting with one of our Stephen ministers.

When our relationship with God and the church means so much to us, we can simply let others know, and invite them to be a part. Don’t preach or push; be your best self and see these occasions as God-given opportunities. Nobody wants “shoulds” and “oughts.” But we can humbly answer for the hope that is in us, in our own natural way.  “Radical hospitality describes churches that strive without ceasing to exceed expectations to accommodate and include others.” (Schnase)

And now I want to show you one little practice that every person can do, every time you are here at TUMC, that can make a world of difference over time irst, you can go up to a stranger and say, “Hi, I’m (name).” And, if necessary, “Help me with your name.” On the card that has been distributed to you, notice the 5-10-Link Rule. The five refers to time. Fellowship and visiting with friends is so important in church. Five minutes before the service starts and five minutes after it ends, meet someone you don’t know! te ten refers to space. Even if you are in a group of friends, when someone you don’t know comes within 10 feet of you, reach out to them and invite them into your group. ink refers to connecting. When you meet someone new, immediately link them to someone else based on a common affinity (occupation, home, state, interests, etc.) onsider yourself deputized to be ministers of hospitality in the name and spirit of Jesus Christ!