When Paul told us to pray without ceasing, I am convinced that the kind of prayer he was talking about is the kind of prayer I have talked about the past few Sundays—prayer that is expressed in the way we live, more than in the words we say. 

This is also a large part of what the prophet Micah was saying in the passage we read. It is not our outward religious expressions that impress and please God most. What interests God most is our living as God intends us to live. It is not our ability to use words eloquently in prayer that pleases God; what pleases God is our effort to do what is good, to do what is just, to be kind, and to be humble. 

Our being in communion with God has relatively little to do with the words we address to God. It has everything to do with our being in a right relationship with God. 

Any of us who have the privilege of having a close friend know that being in communion with that friend has to do with being in relationship much more than the words we speak to one another. In Port Lavaca, I had such a friend with whom I would sometimes go fishing. We did not have to fill the air with words to be in communion with one another. We did not have to say a lot of words to understand where each other was. If close friends can experience being in communion beyond the boundary of words, how much more can we be in communion with God beyond the boundary of words. 

Praying is being in a right relationship with God. But as is true of all relationships, praying, sooner or later, involves the use of words. Prayer is more than words, and certainly prayer is never merely words. But sooner or later prayer involves the use of words. 

Even my introvert friend and I needed to talk some. We did not need a lot of words, but we did need to talk some in order to stay in touch with what the other was thinking or feeling. We needed words to share information, or to share our joys, to give vent to our frustrations or to be helpful to one another when either of us was dealing with some pain or problem. 

If I were ever to use popular movies as a way of trying to teach some of the concepts of the Christian faith, I would choose Fiddler On The Roof as a conversation piece to talk about prayer. 

Tevye, the main character in this musical dealing with a Jewish family in Russia in the late 1800’s, is a profoundly comical character whose life is rooted in his relationship with God. The way he lives in this play illustrates prayer as living in relationship with God and prayer as talking to God. And Tevye is always talking to God. But his talking to God is not empty chatter, nor is it the reciting of formula prayers or religious phrases. Tevye lives in relationship with God, and living in relationship with God, he talks to God. 

He tells God what he wants; His conversation with God even takes on the style of good humored teasing when he says to God, “I’m not really complaining—after all, with Your help, I’m starving to death. You made many, many poor people. I realize, of course, that it’s no shame to be poor, but it’s no great honor either. So what would have been so terrible if I had a small fortune.”^[1] And then Tevye begins to sing the show stopping song: “If I Were A Rich Man” which ends with these words: “Lord, who made the lion and the lamb, You decreed I should be what I am, Would it spoil some vast, eternal plan—if I were a wealthy man?”^[2] 

Tevye talks to God about his troubles; as he struggles with the world changing around him, he talks through his bewilderment with God. Tevye smiles and winks at God in his joy, and with tearful eyes and grief stricken face he turns to God in his sorrow. 

Prayer is being in a right relationship with God, and being in relationship with God sooner or later causes us to talk to God. But when we are in a right relationship with God, our talk is more like the talk between persons who love and care for one another than like a con artist trying to get what he wants from someone. It is honest sharing. 

The basic characteristic of our talk with God, whether it be silent talk or talk out loud, is that it be honest talk. In prayer there is no place for religious pretensions or pious mumbo-jumbo we might use trying to impress God, ourselves and any others who may be listening. Our talk that is prayer is honest talk that comes from the heart. 

And we do not have to worry about the words we use. What God most appreciates is our struggle to be honest with Him, not our theologically correct vocabulary. God understands what we mean. God understands what we mean even if we do not say it right. When Paul wrote the Christians in Rome, he spoke of God understanding our groans or sighs that are too deep for words.^[3] It is what is in our heart more than the way we use words that communicates with God. 

But significant relationship involves more than talking. Significant relationship always involves listening. A significant part of prayer involves us in trying to listen to God. Or to say this another way, a significant part of our relationship with God involves us in trying to discern what God is trying to tell us. 

As difficult as it may be for most of us to speak honestly from the heart to God, it is even more difficult for us to shut up and listen, to strive to hear, to discern, what God is trying to tell us. How do we do that? How do we listen to God? How do we discern what God is trying to tell us? 

The key is something more profound than techniques that can be taught in a course. The key is really wanting to know. The key is our desire to discern what God is saying to us. It is not enough for us merely to say, “It would be nice to know what God is trying to tell me.” What is needed is for us genuinely and sincerely to want to know. 

When we really want to know, we really try to listen, and if we are not trying, that is evidence we do not really want to know. Listening requires us to be still, to shut up, turn off the cell phone, quit looking at our watch and listen. Sometimes we listen for God while reading the scriptures or reading classic hymn texts. Sometimes we listen for God by scribbling on paper, writing uncensored whatever comes to mind until what we see written on the paper rings a bell in our soul and we know it is from God. Sometimes it is simply being silent and inhaling deeply, praying “Thy will”, and exhaling, praying “be done”—doing this over and over and over, allowing stray thoughts to flow through our mind, but keeping our focus on “Thy will be done.” For some of us, some of the time, what eventually floats into our mind are insights we are confident are from God. But the key to listening to God is not in these or other techniques. The key is honestly wanting to know what God has to say to us. 

Prayer has to do with being in relationship with God. This relationship is what I have talked about the past few Sundays. Today I have once again said that prayer is more than words, that prayer has to do with living in communion with God. But I have also gone on to say what all of us know—that any significant relationship also involves talking and listening. 

The primary characteristic of prayer, when it takes the form of talking or listening, is honesty. Prayer that involves words is speaking honestly from our heart to God, and prayer is honestly, earnestly wanting to know what God has to say to us. 

God, help us pray. Amen.

Pastoral Prayer:
            God, as we journey through the season of Lent toward the celebration of Easter, help us make good use of this time for preparation. May Your Holy Spirit be at work in us so that our self-examination is done with such honesty that we are able to see ourselves as You see us. Enable us not only to face what we need to change in our living, but also to see ourselves as your children whom You love. Help us to see the possibilities for our living that You see. Enable us not only to see our sin that needs to be forgiven, but also enable us to see the gift of Your mercy.
           God, as we move through this season of Lent, we remember that most of the religious people in Jesus' day felt threatened by him and his message. At times, O God, when we are aware of how our view of life differs from his and how our priorities are in conflict with his, we too feel our comfort threatened by him and his expectations of us. At times we even feel angry and try to deny both his message to us and his expectations of us. Forgive us. Overcome our resistance to Your will. Give us the courage of faith to face what is wrong and the willingness to strive to change.
           As we come to receive this sacrament, this is our prayer. Amen.

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^[1]Fiddler On The Roof, book by Sheldon Harnick, lyrics by Joseph Stein, music by Jerry Bock.

^[2]Published by Pocket Books, New York, 1971, page 24.

^[3]Ibid., page 27.